“If the word has the potency to revive and make us free, it has also the power to blind, imprison and destroy.”
~Ralph Ellison
When my business first began to receive media exposure and I began to receive awards and accolades, I would always mail copies of the articles and programs of the various awards ceremonies to my parents. They were so proud, and my mom began compiling a scrap book chronicling the growth of my business and my awards.
I will never forget my father having a conversation with me that really put everything in prospective. My father who has had his own share of media coverage, (he was the first African American graduate of Dallas Theological Seminary and ultimately became associate Dean of that institution), told me to always keep what is written and said about me in prospective. He cautioned me to always remember the real me and that what matters most is the person that I am to the people that love me. He reminded me that the accomplishments that the public views as admirable today could become accomplishments that are used to ridicule me later. He reminded me to never define myself by the accolades or the compliments, because if I do when they stop or become negative, I will have a hard time defining a positive me.
As my business has grown, I have had the pleasure of meeting and working with a lot of awesome people. But unfortunately, every interaction has not been positive. I have been forced to walk away from situations that were not ideal for my firm. I have had to fire people and dissolve relationships. I am sure that if you were to try, you could find people (though I hope very few) that may have some not so nice things to say about me and my firm.
So how do you deal with people saying negative things about you? Things that sometimes have not a grain of truth in them? Do you confront them? Do you punch them? Sue them for slander?
For me, I first remind myself that everything happens for a reason, and my journey on earth has been predetermined, thus the role that this person plays in my life has been predetermined and their purpose is to assist me in getting to where it is that I am destined to arrive. Sometimes, people do or say things with evil intentions, but those very intentions are used for my good.
Remember that these people (though they often have no clue) are serving a purpose in your life and they can usher you into greatness if you allow them to; if they are rubbing against you, don’t fight it, maybe you need toughening up in certain areas, or need to grow thicker skin, or maybe you need refining or perhaps you need to be humbled in the areas that hinder you. Either way, you would not experience your current situation if there was not a purpose in it.
So I challenge you to combat negative talk by being even more excellent, by reaching even higher heights and letting those who wish you harm drown in their own negative juices!
So how do you use your naysayers as fuel for your launch to greater heights? Well, my mother would always tell us to make your enemies your footstool. Okay footstool, what exactly is a footstool?
A footstool is a piece of furniture, the purpose of which is to support a person’s feet. There are two main types of footstools, some are for COMFORT and others are for FUNCTION. In other words, they are either for rest or for use for another purpose, such as to elevate you higher than your current state.
Now you can use that footstool to sit down, which will make you lower than your current state, or you can use that footstool to stand on, and allow it to elevate you to a higher state. If you have one nearby, try it. Sit down on it or stand up on it and see which state you would prefer to be in when your enemy is attacking you.
Are you going to allow your enemies to be your stumbling block or are you going to use them as your footstool to elevate you to heights that you have never even imagined?
For me…I say, bring it on haters! I am ready to take flight!